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Grocery Store Humor

Dog eat Doug

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Dog eat Doug
Is it Friday already? Did I completely forget to write ANYTHING this week?  I guess I just haven’t had the ability to make the words flow from my brain to my fingertips.  Or maybe I’ve been PMSing and I was saving you the agony of reading the rants and raves of a hormonal lunatic. Or maybe I was just lazy.  Hmmm. Well, I guess ya’ll will be expecting something good now that I started with a cute cartoon and all.  So with the grocery store theme from the other day I’ll share a little more grocery store humor with you. When EJ was still just a sitter and not really too mobil yet (I really believe there was such a time although it’s hard to remember) I started sitting her on the conveyer belt in the check out lanes with the rest of the groceries. It was like her very own grocery store carnival ride. She would squeal, giggle, and clap all the way to the check out person who would either squeal, giggle, and clap too or snarl something at me that I would just tune out. (Because I’m THAT self centered mom, only focused on my kids happiness because I suck, and because people just need to lighten up… really…)

Speaking of lighting up, while I was also getting dirty looks from all the other super moms in the store who’s carts are filled with organics while mine was filled with Ramin Noodles (my kid loves Ramin Noodles, what more can I say except for “HELLO!!” CHEAP!), my daughter was having the time of her life! And as a bonus for me, it kept her from grabbing everything off the candy shelves. It also provided a wonderful opportunity for distraction when necessary. That way I could get her to release the death grip she may have had on other items she snagged throughout the store. By check out these items were one conveyer belt ride away from freedom from her little grabby hands without WW3 happening.

Maybe the reason my daughter is kinda weird, in a good way of course, is because her Momma is? Hmmm. I can handle that. She also has a thing for the plastic bags from the produce department. If I put an onion in the bag and tie it off and hand it to her its like giving her a diamond. She loves onions.

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